What do I do? Please help me.

My high schools years were mostly relaxing. I didn’t have to stress about nothing but my friend and my ex-boyfriend that was a considering me like a total joke. I got rid of him after my humanitarian journeys in Costa Rica. I was a brand-new person. I was happy, gain back my original weight which I loose of stress and became really dedicated to school. More often than not, I was at the library studying and making sure I make time for my sport after school. In other words, I was determined to get my general average over 85% which I was so close to accomplish. March 2020 came, and I was confronted with two choices for my college program….

Choice 1 : Police Technology.

Choice 2 : Flight attendant.

Police Technology.

To become a police officer, I had to have a general average of 85% and over. In March, I was at 84.6%. I decided to take a chance and go for it. For weeks, I was stressed wondering if it were a good idea to apply. I worked twice as hard with time management to make it over 85%. Back then, COVID-19 was starting and everything, little by little was getting close. Including the gym. So, I wondered. Will I be able to get more in shape for the physical test if I’m accepted? After weeks of getting in shape at home, I received an email that says I was accepted. I can’t even describe the joy I felt at this moment. Now the anxiety kick in. Turn out the physical test were canceled because of the virus, so I set aside my shape because everything was based on my grade. Now where do I want to pursue my study?

Choice 1 : John Abbott College.

Choice 2 : Maisonneuve College.

Choice 3 : Ahuntsic College.

Flight attendant.

To become a flight attendant, I had to have a general average of 80%. To make it, it was necessary to have a diploma of a 2- or 3-year program and a diploma of Collegian Studies in Aviation which is another 2 years. I was willing to do all those studies because I always admired the professionalism behind this job, and I didn’t travel that much when I was young, so I wanted to make that an experience. But at the end, many question pop out in my head. If one day I want to have kids, will I be able to see them as many times as I want? If I want a house and pays a mortgage, will I be able to even pass 1 day a week in it? If something happened to my mom, will I be able to free myself easily for her? Guest what I choose.

Choice 1 : No, I did not apply.

John Abbott College.

John Abbott College is one of five English language CEGEPs in Quebec. Named after Sir John Abbott, Canada’s third Prime Minister, the College primarily serves the Greater Montreal region, though you can also meet students from other parts of Quebec and the rest of Canada. The College was incorporated nearly two years after the Quebec CEGEP system was launched in 1968. Because it was an English college, I was scared to fail my courses. But at the same time, I wanted to be with my brother, so I could have at least one friend. What did I do?

Choice 1 : Poor results and a friend.

Maisonneuve College.

If Maisonneuve is today a high-quality CEGEP, whose reputation for excellence goes well-beyond the Island of Montreal, it is thanks to the rigor and commitment of the people who have worked there and who have studied there since its foundation. College de Maisonneuve celebrated its 50th anniversary in 2017. Since its creation, it has understood the needs of its community and society to evolve, to reinvent itself and to remain a present and innovative partner for its students, young people and adults. The Police Technology program at this school is not the best. Why?

Choice 1 : If, I go.

If, I go.

Maisonneuve is well-known for their less inclusive state of mind which put aside visible minorities. In today society, it's not the best to form our police officers with this mindset.

Choice 1 : I did not go to this school.

Poor result and a friend?

I am well-known to be a solitary girl that is conscious of her grades. I don't think it's worth risking it.

Choice 1 : I did not go to this school.

Ahuntsic College.

Accessibility, support and responsibility are the primary values of the commitment of the College's educational community. Ahuntsic college is well-known for their inclusivity. I knew that at this school, I was going to feel in the right place. The Police Technology as been implanted in 1972 which mean for a long time now, this college form many police officers which stand out at Nicolet for their grate complete training. Being alone would also help me get more concentrate and because it's a French school I knew I would pull off great marks. The choice was clear.

Choice 1 : I decided to go to this school!

It's the moment I realized...

Because the Police Technology program is base on a paramilitary structure, I knew that the professor were going to be strict and extremely demanding. At first, when you enter the program they make you realize what you are going to do or see which could lead most of the time to a post-traumatic stress. The thing you see are incredible. 90% of the population will never see what a police officer see during his career. Saving life and making sure no one ever see something horrible was my goal. So, their realistic approach make me want to push myself more and more to well perform and surpass myself. Did it work?

Choice 1 : Yes, it worked!

Choice 2 : No, it did not work.

Yes, it worked!

All of this pushing forced me to go against anything. I worked so hard and I graduated on time from Ahuntsic College and Nicolet, the Quebec official police school.

Choice 1 : Patrol policeman.

Choice 2 : K9 policeman.

Choice 3 : Mounted policeman.

No, it did not work.

This method of learning was not for me at all. Their strictness was like an on- the- job-training but not for me. It got me overwhelm and discourage about the job, and at the same time about my grades. I started to fail some classes and getting meet by my API about that. I stopped showing to class and getting a lot of absence which lead me to get expelled from certain classes.

Choice 1 : I decided to drop out of college and never went back again.

Patrol policeman.

Being directly in the field makes us in contact with so many incredible situation. Some of them and extremely dangerous. I could get killed, shot, stabbed, punch and others thing could happen to me or to my colleagues. Should I risk of being vulnerable for the perpetrator?

Choice 1 : Yes.

Choice 2 : No.

Yes.

Unfortunately, I did not make it. My family miss me since the day I died.

Choice 1 : Bye bye Kellyn.

No.

I decided I would not give them the opportunity to do anything to me. I want to be safe and help my community without dying anytime sooner.

Choice 1 : let's be safe.

K9 policeman.

No matter what animal it is, I love them so much. Imagine taking care of your best friend and colleague at the same time. What a dream!

Choice 1 : I happily live with this little boy!

Mounted policeman.

Since I was 15 years old, I have been a horsewoman. I feel connected to them and our chemistry is unbelievable. With the stress of the work, it feels like an animal therapy. That a great alternative!

Choice 1 : Say "cheese"!

Flight attendant.

Indeed, flight attendants make over $97 000 a year of income, but I don't think it's worth staying away from my love one. They do a lot of overtime. We don't have enough time to let our parent know I much we love them. I think this is the best for me.

Choice 1 : I stayed in my own town and found another field of study.

The end.

The end!

Choice 1 :