Choosing my program.

It’s been hard for me to choose what I wanted to do. I really like kids, and I also always imagined working with something related to money. Having a sister can really come in handy. I usually go to her when I can’t decide. I’ve been indecisive.

Choice 1 : Insurance and Financial Advisor.

Choice 2 : Special Care Counselling.

Insurance and Financial Advisor.

This is the program I choose. I went to a car dealership, and I met a financial advisor. I was really amazed about all the terms she was using. It made me want to learn more about them. My interest start developing even more. I even started looking at their income.

Choice 1 : Studies.

Special Care Counseling.

I really wanted to go in Special Care Counseling but when I talked about it with my sister she made me realize something. She made me think of how I really want kids, and if I wanted to be with them 24/7. It made me think a lot. I felt like this job might somehow overwhelm me. I couldn’t imagine myself going to work and helping with kids and then going home to relax but I’ll still need to deal with kids.

Choice 1 : Choosing my program.

Stressful days.

Now that I have a foot in the door some stress really came. I thought of leaving my dead-end job for a while not to have too much stress especially with the overtime they kept giving me, but I still needed the money. I help my parents pay for the mortgage. I also had to study some things in psychology and marketing.

Choice 1 : My job.

Choice 2 : Studies.

My job.

I really love my job. The first time I had an on the job training (OJT) was last summer. I had the chance to work at the airport after the border. The drawback for me was that I had to wake up super early since my shifts started at 4 a.m. Since I was a trainee my colleague had to past the security with me for 3 months and I had to put the stuff I brought in the scan which he didn't have to do. At least, when I worked that early, my wage was higher since there was a prime for working night shift. There were other drawbacks which were related to stress, overtime and especially the travel time from Laval to Montreal since I do not drive. Now, I had to choose to leave it or not.

Choice 1 : Quitting.

Choice 2 : Studies.

Studies.

I have to put my studies before anything else. There's a lot of stuff to memorize. I had to learn how to use excel and how to type without looking which is really hard for me. Insurance stuff is all by heart which is still a big struggle for me. All of my studies overwhelm me but at the end it's worth it. You can see the different when you focus more on one stuff compared to when you don't.

Choice 1 : Thinking of Quitting.

Choice 2 : Agenda.

Thinking of Quitting.

I started having anxiety. Working in an airport can make you stress a lot. The travelers make you feel their stress. They make you feel made if ever you make an error. They would even blame you in advance saying it's our fault for missing their flight. My coworkers and I would get in big arguments with them. The client would feel embarrassed because of them I work with could get really loud. We always end up winning. I meet many people, and they are the one that made me want to stay. We would always go out and enjoy time together without needing to argument with a client. We always had each other's backs. That is what made me stay.

Choice 1 : My job.

Choice 2 : Studies.

Choice 3 : Making an Agenda.

Making an Agenda.

To help me with all things I had to do, I planned my days. I had a to-do list which really helped me. I'm someone who is pretty forgetful. I had to start being organized. I can see now what I have to catch up with instead of forgetting about it. I bought myself a white board. I divided it in 5 sections since I have 5 different subjects. I wrote every assignment and I wrote the due dates. It made me feel well-prepared. Especially when I saw in my agenda that I'm scheduled to work the following days, I made sure my work would be done in advance. At least, I would stress about those at work.

Choice 1 : Getting better.

Getting better.

With everything going on I have to try to keep my cool. I asked the things I'm going through and I got to help myself. Letting go of unnecessary fights was one of the best choices I made even if it seemed like I didn't actually wanted to let go. Mental health awareness is something that's starting to get more developed every day. I really was overwhelming myself with too much stuff. I have hard time letting go. I needed to be strong and to be healthy.

Choice 1 : Take a time off.

Failing.

The session was coming to an end. I felt so much stress. My grades weren't good. I got worried I would fail multiple classes. I started calculating my grade to see how much I needed to pass. At some point, I didn't even want to go to school. More assignments were piling up. I didn't felt any motivation.

Choice 1 : Studies.

Choice 2 : Study More.

Choice 3 : Changing program.

Choice 4 : Making an Agenda.

Study More.

Giving up couldn't be an option. I started asking more questions. I putted my shyness aside. I started to revise all of my notes. I even re-wrote them to make them nice and clear. I motivated myself by thinking of how I can be more organized since I like being organized. I motivated myself with food. Let me explain. Let say I have a book to read. Every time I finish a chapter I would be allowed to eat one piece of chocolate. Surprisingly, it actually helped me. I realized how much time I was saving. At least, it didn't overwhelm me anymore.

Choice 1 : Studies.

Choice 2 : Making an Agenda.

Choice 3 : Getting better.

Changing program.

With all the hard time, I started thinking as if I wasn't in the good program. I even thought of all the things I hated about it. I was thinking of all the other programs and I started to imagine myself in them. I really got confused. My indecisive side started to rise in me. I thought I didn't know what I want anymore.

Choice 1 : Thinking of Quitting.

Choice 2 : Insurance and Financial Advisor.

Choice 3 : Special Care Counselling.

Choice 4 : Reminding myself.

Reminding myself.

With my class, it made me imagine working in a bank more specifically in a call center. I went to talk about with my moms friend who works for Desjardins. I thought she was going to motivate me a bit but all she said was negative things. It really choked me. Surprisingly, I start telling her all of the things I like. For example, that we do not need to have any physical contact with anyone. That's something that stresses me. I told her how it could help us help others. That's one of the main reasons why I wanted to choose Finance and Insurance Counseling.

Choice 1 : Insurance and Financial Advisor.

Looking for a Job.

I start to search for different jobs opportunities. I didn't really found a bank related jobs. I figured I need to have a contact.

Choice 1 : Laval.

Choice 2 : Montreal.

Montreal.

I had an interview in down town. The job really seemed interesting as well as the income. The only bad thing is that's really far. From my house to their it can take me more than 1 hour an 30 minutes. I had to look for one a bit closer to my house.

Choice 1 : Laval.

Laval.

The job a choose is way closer to my house. I can even just take the bust and it will take me 20 maximum minutes. When I take my car it takes about 10 minutes without traffic, there's always some though.

Choice 1 : University.

Relationship.

My relationship is really important to me. We plan to get married when I finish college. The only problem is that we do not leave in the same city. He's about an hour away from Laval. I believe I'll need to change some stuff. I'm not sure if I'm going to university yet. I can't wait to be with him. I'm turning 22 but I still have 3 years of studies to do, when I am 25 I think it's an average age to get married.

Choice 1 : Laval.

Choice 2 : University.

Choice 3 : Kids.

University.

I already thought of going to university, but not anymore. I really feel tired of school. I really want to work, get married and have kids.

Choice 1 : Laval.

Choice 2 : Relationship.

Choice 3 : Kids.

Kids.

Having children is something I really want. I always pray that God will bless me with at least two, but not while I'm at school. I feel like this is gonna be too much for me.

Choice 1 : University.

Retirement.

When I work an amount is set aside for my retirement. For me, it's important to prepare to retire. I don't want to be in my 50s and I don't have any money in my name. I want to travel and to be free. Retirements are made to relax and enjoy. Although for now I have to pay my mortgage. It can be stressful to see all the debts you have to pay. I am young, so I wan to work the more often possible to be able to pay everything off. My grand mother retired and she is enjoying doing nothing. That is what I can't wait for.

Choice 1 : Laval.